Saturday, October 31, 2009

Happy Halloween! 10/31/09

That rock 'n' roll dude sure looks mean
But that pirate's the cutest I've seen
And they're coming for you
So what will you do?
Give them candy -- Happy Halloween!


Friday, October 30, 2009

'Twas the night before Halloween, 10/30/09

My children can hardly believe
The candy they're set to receive
That they border on spastic,
So enthusiastic
Are they this All Hallows' Eve's Eve.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Daylight savings, 10/29/01

I'd just like to thank Nate and Zach
Who no longer wake in pitch black
Which makes for a fun day...
Or it will until Sunday
When we have to turn the clocks back.

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

The wind blows, 10/28/09

Summer left us last night, in a huff
It's heat, it seems, had had enough
And so gave way to
The winds, how they blew
Knocking over a bunch of our stuff.

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Newsunworthy, 10/27/09

My nightstand is starting to creak
Beneath issues unread, so I'll seek
Out a new magazine,
One that I haven't seen:
News-somewhat-less-than-a-week.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Pick up game, 10/26/09

As lawyerly legal tricks go,
This one's kinda starting to blow:
I'm not bound, yet not free
Because technically
They haven't yet picked up the show.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

A four year-old, the three ages of dinosaurs, and two slackjawed parents, 10/25/09

It's apparent his brain is capacious
As tonight he once more got loquacious
Telling us how he knows
The geology goes
Triassic, Jurassic, Cretaceous.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Boys in the back seat, 10/24/09

Screaming like a banshee, a
Disobedient cacophony, the
Time that we'd had
Gone from lovely to bad...
And then came the diarrhea.

Friday, October 23, 2009

Optimism, 10/23/09

It might be too early to say
But it's possible that this screenplay
Is starting to break
And we just might make
A movie that's halfway okay.

Technical difficulties, 10/22/09

Yesterday, I tried to write
A limerick for this website
But it could not be posted
For the place that it's hosted
Was apparently down for the night.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

"You came back!" 10/21/09

At last, little, one you've adjusted
To preschool, decided you trusted
Things would be okay
While Mommy's away
Which is nice. Cause her patience was busted.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

I changed our flights from China, the least you can do is smile, 10/20/09

Having flown back to LA
Just in time for the kids' picture day
We fully expect
That the pics will reflect
This sacrifice that we have made.

Monday, October 19, 2009

Home again, home again, 10/19/09

Our flight to Chicago, delayed
So there in Columbus we stayed
Then moved heaven and earth
And through Dallas/Ft. Worth
With a connection we barely made.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

East vs. West, 10/18/09

The cuisine of the Orient shows
That virtually anything goes
But the cuisine of Columbus
Is less of a rumpus
And this evening consists of Rubino's.

Saturday, October 17, 2009

Not getting the memo, 10/17,09

I guess no one told OSU
That it's Wede's birthday, and to
Not lose the game
'Cause that'd be kind of lame
When she's 90 and it's just Purdue.

Friday, October 16, 2009

China, in hindsight, 10/16/09

Skip the train to Tibet, take the flight.
Skip seeing doggies that bite.
And once in Beijing
Just stay there, don't wing
Straight away to Xi'an for one night.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Now comes the hard part, 10/15/09

Having flown back from China alive
Now I just have to survive
A trip to Ohio
Where I have to fly to
With two children, both under five.

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Pixellated, 10/14/09

His vocab expands unabated,
So much so it seems we've created
A child, age four
Who can complain your
Computer screen "is pixellated."

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Monumental Error, 10/13/09

I have seen why the wall is called "Great"
And Tiananmen's Square's sides are straight
But the Forbidden City
Was so quick to admit me
A name change should probably be made.

Knock it off, 10/12/09

Rolexes, Pateks, and Tags
Chanel, Prada, and Vuitton bags
Anything you can wear
They've got it all here
And it's fake -- so the prices aren't bad.

To and Fro(ttage), 10/11/09

Arriving once more in Beijing
(It can wear on you, the traveling)
But fortunately
Around here, till 3
There are places that do massaging.

Ommmmmm...my god we're going to die, 10/10/09

The narrow road truly was scary
As we drove up to the monastery
So treacherous you'd a
Been praying to Buddha
Like I was -- and everyone near me.

Yak, yak, yak 10/9/09

Once you take it, you can't put it back
This savory linguiform snack
'Cause that's what you get
When you dine in Tibet:
The delectable tongue of the yak.

H1N1... NE1? NE1? 10/8/09

A pickle.  A fine mess.  A stew.
We may be in; what do we do
If, as it seems
We could be quarantined 
Suspected of having swine flu.

The little engine that not only could it did for 33 hours and I was on it, 10/7/09

33 hours by Train to Tibet
And among the things you cannot get:
Toilet paper and towels
Or a place to move your bowels
That isn't disgusting and wet.

Cock of the Ox, 10/6/09

From the fattiest meat to the leanest
What I ate tonight was the extremest:
A meal made of ox
Who'd surrendered their cocks
For a succulent bowlful of penis.

The Odyssey, 10/5/09

If you want to take some of the sting
Off a 13 hour flight to Beijing
Get an eye mask and then
Ingest one Ambien
And you won't remember a thing.

Sunday, October 4, 2009

Packing it in, 10/4/09

I'd really better get packing
But sadly, inertia is lacking
So if I want to get
On that plane to Tibet
Then I'd probably better get cracking.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Zombieland, 10/3/09

This evening, as previously planned
We we went to a faraway land
Known as Sherman Oaks
Where we joined with some folks
And enjoyed us all some Zombieland

Friday, October 2, 2009

Sukkot, 10/2/09

Tonight a most pleasant Sukkot
A holiday that gets my vote
For oddest accessories
Lulov? Etrog? What are these?
Second place: Chanukah's sufganiyot.

Thursday, October 1, 2009

And then he wandered out into the hall, 10/1/09

I said good night, it was bedtime
And thought that things seemed to be fine.
But he said "I can't sleep"
I suggested "count sheep"
Which he did. Till he reached 409.